There's this expectation that we forgive out of compassion. Seeing the situation from the other's point of view, that they are doing the best they can and when they can do better they will, walking a mile in their shoes before we judge.
I'm finding this to be backwards. Those lovely perspectives aren't available to those of us who have yet to attain sainthood. What we can do is forgive for our own benefit. For us. Because we cannot heal from the wound until we do. Not because forgiveness is deserved.
When forgiving happens and we free ourselves from being trapped in an endless loop of anger and resentment, we can be at peace. When we are once again at peace, some of those lovely perspectives might be available. And that is good.